You Had Me at Ezio

I've been playing the Ezio Collection-- again a bundle on sale through PlayStation. Let me just say that Ezio got me like, "Alexios who?" Sorry my swarthy Greek half-nekkid babydoll, there's a new sheriff in town. Well, technically an older one because if you go by the Assassin's Creed games release dates then Ezio came first. Then again if you go by historical era in which the characters lived then Alexios is much, MUCH older. No worries, nothing a little Viagra can't fix.

Sorry, I got sidetracked. Anyhoo, Ezio is the baddest ass in a long line of badasses. Though the game mechanics feel weird since I've been playing the AC franchise backward, the stories, the world-building and the player-engagement feels a lot richer. More simmered and well spiced, like a rich, meaty stew.

Speaking of rich and meaty, I gotta say it once more: Ezio is a lovely hunk of man flesh and never once do we see anything bared more than a little upper chest and collar bone. Gotta love the very Renaissance male plunging neck line.

Okay, okay, focus, Foxx. I really liked AC2, I thoroughly enjoyed AC: Brotherhood and AC: Revelations is nothing short of...well, a revelation. The amped up action and legion of assassins you can train to master level give this game the ass-kicking, murderous potential one wants from a game with the word ASSASSIN in the title.

All that being true, I still don't really care about the central storyline which is what all these games lack. It's hard to connect with any of the main characters in any of the ASSASSIN'S CREED games. As Game-vember approaches I hope with all my heart VALHALLA proves an improvement in this aspect.